A Heart Healed Read online

  He straightened his shoulders and lifted his chin. “I’m quite handsome, aren’t I?”

  Callie laughed out loud. “And, still just like the Ben I remember.”

  “I think I recognize that laugh.” A deep voice sounded from the top of the stairs. In a flash, Kirk’s dad, Mike, descended the stairs with Tammie following. Callie was awarded two more hugs. Mike kissed the top of her head. “It’s good to see you, girl. Tammie told me you were coming to stay with us. What a blessing.”

  “I think it’s me receiving the blessing.” Callie smiled up at him, a peace and acceptance she hadn’t felt in a long time welled within her. How many nights had she spent caring for a dying mother and then a dying father and then dying patients? Death had surrounded her for so many years; she had forgotten what life was like. Being in this home for only a few minutes and she was already beginning to remember. And it felt oh, so good.

  The front door opened then slammed shut. Callie sucked in her breath. The two girls jumped on the grizzly of a man who walked in. “Uncle Kirk!” They shouted in unison. He welcomed their attention, wrapping them both in a bear hug at one time. Placing them back on their feet, he looked up, his eyes widening when he saw Callie.

  Shivers raced down Callie’s spine and her hands started to shake at the sight of the only man she’d ever loved. Her body’s reaction stunned her, but she forced a hesitant smile. “Hi, Kirk.”

  Surprise erased from his expression as he furrowed his brow and scowled. “I thought you were dead.”

  Chapter 2

  A nervous giggle slipped through Callie’s lips as she patted her arms and legs. “Nope. Not dead. I’m as alive as I’ve ever been.”

  Kirk’s expression didn’t change as his gaze shifted from her to his family. Callie didn’t have to look at the others. The tension in the room was thick as death, and she knew they also were bewildered by his comment.

  “I told you to stop saying that.” Pamela slipped the words through gritted teeth.

  Callie gawked at her friend. Was that something he said often? Maybe they weren’t bewildered. Maybe just stunned that she was alive. Why would they think she was dead?

  Remorse filled her anew because she hadn’t contacted Kirk when she made it to her dad’s house in Jackson, Tennessee. Confusion replaced her regret. But wouldn’t he be glad to see me, hugging me even, if he thought I’d died and then discovered I was still alive?

  She gazed back at the man who, five years ago, she would have been willing to spend the rest of her life with if things had been different. The fury raging in his eyes was proof enough he’d never believed her dead. Only dead to him.

  Aggravated, Callie lifted her shoulders and chin. The overgrown bully would not intimidate her. In her experience, bullies ran away when confronted, and Kirk Jacobs was about to be just that. “Did you hear on the news that I had died?” Callie’s tone dripped with sarcasm as she crossed her arms in front of her chest, bracing herself for a verbal battle. “Did you attend my funeral?”

  Kirk mimicked her stance. “No, but we sure heard you got married.”

  Callie gasped, then a loud clap sounded. She turned toward the maker of the interruption.

  “Well, it’s about time for me to head over to the house.” Ben nodded his head toward Callie. He clicked his tongue and winked, reminding her of the boy she remembered. “See ya tomorrow, Cals,” he said as he sprinted out the back entrance.

  “Yeah, and the girls and I need to run to the store.” Pamela grabbed her purse and motioned for her children.

  “But I don’t want to go to the store.” Emmy stomped her foot and stuck out her lip. “I haven’t seen Uncle Kirk in forever.”

  “Yeah.” Emma joined in, twirling a red curl between her fingertips. “He promised to play Candyland with us.”

  “No sassing.” Pamela scooped up two pairs of sandals from beside the back door and handed them to the children. “Put these on.”

  “I can’t do the buckles,” Emmy whined and threw her pair onto the floor.

  “These aren’t mine, Mom,” Emma snapped and let hers fall, as well. “You gave me the wrong pair.”

  “Looks like you’re going to need a little help,” Tammie responded before Pamela could scold the children. She peered down at her granddaughters. “Do we talk to our mother that way?”

  Both girls’ chins dropped. “Sorry, Mommy.”

  “That’s better.” Pamela waited while the girls flopped onto the floor to put on their shoes. “We’ve no time for that.”

  Tammie added, “Just pick them up. We’ll put them on in the car.” She turned to her husband, and Callie was struck again at how little Tammie had aged in five years. Choppy, shoulder-length dark hair and bright green eyes, the woman looked nothing like any grandma Callie had ever known. “Mike, you need to check on the...on the...”

  Mike snapped his fingers. “On the horses.” Though Callie and Mike had shared nothing more than a quick hug since her return, she still saw the same quiet kindness behind his deep gray eyes.

  “Yes.” Tammie grabbed his elbow then waved at Callie with her free hand. “We’ll see you tomorrow, Callie.”

  Callie couldn’t believe so many people had cleared the room so fast. She frowned at Kirk and shook her head. “I’m sorry, Kirk. Did you just say I was married?”

  “That’s right.” Kirk walked across the room and plopped down in a large brown recliner. “So, where is Mr. High and Mighty?”

  “I never got married.”

  He leaned back. “Sure, you did. Pamela heard it straight from the guy’s mouth.”

  Callie rubbed her temple with the tips of her fingers. For the life of her, she had no idea what Kirk was talking about. She hadn’t even gone on a date with anyone except Kirk. No one had even asked—well, that wasn’t exactly true. There was a hospice patient in his late sixties who she’d grown quite fond of, and he had always said if he were forty years younger and in good health, he would have snatched her up.

  Callie’s stomach turned. Frank’s death seemed to forge the final crack in Callie’s already-breaking heart. But Callie felt pretty sure Kirk wasn’t talking about the elderly hospice patient. “What guy? I’ve never been married.”

  “That dark-haired fellow you left with. The one who drove the red Corvette. Gotta admit it. Though I didn’t like the guy much, he sure had good taste in vehicles.”

  Callie furrowed her eyebrows. “You mean Bill?”

  Kirk shrugged. “I didn’t know his name. He told Pamela at the store that you two were getting hitched.”

  Callie tried to wrap her mind around the information and how it could have possibly gotten so distorted. She made her way to the couch across from Kirk and plopped down. “Bill is my cousin, my dad’s brother’s son. I’d never even met him until the week he showed up here. Evidently, my dad and his dad had a serious falling out when they were teenagers and never spoke to each other until...”

  Callie let the sentence drop. She didn’t want to revisit everything again. She’d spent the past three years trying to recover by throwing every piece of herself into the encouragement and aid of others. She finally realized nursing terminal patients was not the place for her to be. At least not right now. Not until I’m healed.

  Kirk frowned and for a brief moment Callie saw a glimmer of hope, or maybe even affection, behind his gaze. Callie steeled herself to the slight jolt to her heart. She didn’t need to think about Kirk. She needed...

  Kirk’s words interrupted her thoughts. “But he said...”

  “Bill was getting married the very next Saturday after he came here to get me, but he wasn’t marrying me.”

  “But Pamela said...”

  Callie shook her head. “Pamela must have misunderstood. I’ve never married.”

  “But you left.”

 
; “I had to.”

  “Why?”

  “Why does it matter? You broke it off with me, remember?” Callie smacked her hands against the couch. “Kirk, you hadn’t spoken to me for two months before I left.” She lifted her pointer and middle fingers. “Two months. You said you needed a break.”

  * * *

  Kirk rubbed his hands together. “I didn’t mean it.”

  “Two months of nothing, Kirk. I think that shows you meant it.”

  The memory of that time would be forever marked in his mind. As his feelings for Callie had grown stronger, so had his fear of commitment. He’d fallen in love with her, and the admission of it, even if only to himself, terrified him. The first few days after the suggested break, Kirk threw himself into farm work. By the end of the first week things started going wrong on the farm—a calf born breech, a fallen tree that tore down part of the fence. One mishap after another kept him from getting in touch with Callie and asking her to forgive his foolishness. Two months later, Bill showed up. Then pride wouldn’t allow Kirk to contact her.

  And he let her go. Just like that.

  He’d been a fool. He stood and walked away from her penetrating gaze. Callie followed behind him. She grabbed his arm and turned him until he had no choice but to gaze down into her crystal-blue eyes. Honesty and sincerity radiated from the orbs, twisting his heart.

  “You never came for me.”

  “I thought you got married.” His words came out in a whisper. They didn’t sound convincing even to his own ears.

  “But you never even confronted me about that. We dated all those years and you thought I would up and marry a guy after two months apart?”

  Her words cut at him, and he winced at the pain as he looked away from her gaze. What had he been thinking? A man who loved his woman would chase the guy down and show him with his fists who had the right to his girl’s hand. But, Kirk had carried too much pride to go after her. He’d always been too proud, too worried about someone getting the best of him. It was something God had worked with him on for the past several years. “You still left. Why?”

  Callie closed her eyes. “It’s a long story.”

  “I’m listening.”

  Callie opened her eyes and shook her head. “No. Not tonight.” She exhaled a long breath. “I think I need to head over to the cabin for tonight.”

  Kirk frowned. “No. You’ll stay here. The cabin’s a mess. No electricity. No water. No—”

  “It’s all ready and fixed up for me. Tammie and Mike worked on it all week.”

  Kirk hadn’t noticed his parents working on the cabin. But then they would have wanted to keep Callie’s upcoming appearance from him. Still, he would have helped. It upset him to think his family would keep such a big task from him. “At least let me walk you over there.”

  Callie shook her head. “No, really, Kirk. I need some time alone.”

  She turned and walked out the door. It had been a long while since Kirk felt so low. He’d been wrong in more ways tonight...and in the past five years...than he was able to count. Pride, which almost always reared its ugly head in the form of ranting anger, had once again bested him. And once again, he’d embarrassed himself in front of the people he cared about most. “Forgive me, Lord.”

  * * *

  Callie awakened at dawn to a rooster’s crows and a dog’s bark, and the noises had never before sounded more glorious. After five years of cars and trains, Callie welcomed the much earlier rising time if it included such wonderful accompaniment. The ability to inhale fresh, clean air wasn’t too bad, either. Pushing the night before and its verbal exchange with Kirk as far back in her mind as possible, Callie stared up at the ceiling. “God, I could so get used to this again.”

  With a nudging of excitement welling in her spirit, Callie slipped out of the covers and put on her fluffy multicolored socks and fuzzy, hot-pink robe. As soon as she brewed a good, strong cup of coffee, she would head over to the barn to see the animals. Too many years had slipped by since she’d spent time with nature, and her senses were long overdue.

  The sunrise caught her attention through the small kitchen window. Racing to the back door, Callie flung it open and sucked in the majesty of God’s creation. The huge white-gold sphere seemed to rise from the ground as it pushed its way through waves of red, orange and yellow. The earth screamed the arrival of a new day, and Callie bit back her tears. Oh, God, I needed this. I needed to see life, to see Your awesome majesty.

  Hurrying around the kitchen, Callie made her coffee, adding sugar and cream just the way she liked it. She slipped on a T-shirt and jeans and a pair of rubber boots, rushed out the back door and headed toward the barn. Newly grown grass crunched ever so slightly beneath her feet. Dandelions carpeted the ground, but even they reminded her of the rebirth of spring.

  Without thinking, she bent down and plucked several from the earth. She stuck one behind her ear, then twisted the stems of several more together until they were long enough to drape her neck as a necklace. “How many years has it been since I wore one of these?”

  She giggled as she continued her trek to the barn. No one would be there at this time. Kirk and Ben would have already done their chores close to home and would be out in the fields by now. At least, she hoped so. Even the chance of running into Kirk couldn’t sway her from seeing the animals.

  The memory of their argument made her almost laugh out loud. The big goof thought I was married. The knowledge of what she had been doing those five years swept over her. I would have rather been married than...

  She bent down and plucked another dandelion. I will not think about that, Lord. Help me focus on You and the wonder of Your creation.

  Excitement welled in her chest as she passed several trees budding with flowers, thinking of the fruit that would soon appear. She paused at the chicken coop, laughing at the baby chicks fighting for food. Finally, she made her way to the barn, hoping upon hope the mare she’d cherished would still be there. Her heart sank at the empty stall, even though she knew the horse might be in the field.

  “Looking for someone?”

  Callie jumped at the sound of Ben’s voice behind her. She turned and saw the young man standing beside her beloved brown mare. Callie walked over and caressed the white patch on the horse’s nose. “Princess.”

  “She’s not as strong as she used to be.” Ben rubbed the side of her neck. “Broke her leg about four years back.”

  Callie gasped, covering her mouth with her hand. “Oh, no.”

  Ben nodded. “The vet suggested we put her down. But Kirk wouldn’t let her go.”

  Callie noticed a shadow to her left. She looked and saw Kirk watching them. His gaze seemed haunted, and thick wrinkles around his eyes spoke of a sleepless night. For all his gruffness, Callie knew he’d been blindsided to find out she’d never married. She knew he was proud, but why would he be willing to save her horse, but let her go?

  Chapter 3

  Kirk walked to the B and B while Ben and Callie got the petting zoo ready for the school group scheduled to arrive later that day. He knew Mom and Pamela would be busy getting treats ready for the kids, but he needed to talk with his sister. He pushed open the door with a huff and marched over to Pamela. “She never married.”

  “Uncle Kirk,” Emmy squealed.

  “Not now,” Pamela scolded, and Emmy’s expression fell.

  Kirk’s heart softened at the sight of his niece. “Go set up the game in the dining room. I’ll be in there in a minute.”

  Kirk rumpled Emmy’s hair, then looked back at his sister. He shrugged at her grin and raised eyebrow. “What? A man can take a minute’s break for his niece. The game won’t take long, especially since Emma’s at school and it will just be the two of us.”

  He hardened his expression, crossing his arms in front of his chest. �
�But you and I both know that’s not why I’ve come.”

  Pamela stopped rinsing the strawberries and wiped her hands on a towel. “Kirk, the man said plain as day that he was marrying Callie.”

  Kirk squinted his eyes. “What were his words exactly?”

  “Come on, Kirk.” Pamela brushed a strand of hair out of her eyes with the back of her hand. “That was five years ago, but it was something like, ‘Next Saturday I’m marrying Callie.’”

  “Actually, he married a lady named Allie.”

  Pamela frowned. “Allie?”

  “Yeah. I looked them up on the internet.”

  “You looked them up?”

  Noting the humor in his mother’s voice, he turned toward her. “What? You can find out anything on the internet.”

  “Yeah, but—” His mom laughed.

  Pamela joined her. “Who would have ever thought you would actually do it.”

  Kirk squinted and pursed his lips. His mom cut the top off a strawberry then glanced up at Kirk. “Okay. So, it was a simple misunderstanding.”

  “A simple misunderstanding!” Kirk boomed. He glared at Pamela. “I hardly think losing Callie can be labeled a misunderstanding.”

  Pamela shrank beneath his outburst, and Kirk cringed. His sister had lived with the fury of an irrational man, one who rarely treated her as he should. She and Jack never divorced, but as long as he continued to tip the bottle, Kirk was glad the guy stayed away. He would even make sure the guy stayed away if the need arose. He took a long, deep breath. “I’m sorry, Pamela.”

  She shrugged her shoulders as his mother placed the paring knife on the counter with a loud tap. “Son, you’re the one who didn’t seek out Callie to find the truth.”

  “I know, Mom.” Kirk had punished himself all night for his foolishness. He wished he would have swallowed his pride, found her and convinced her to stay with him.

  “I’m so mad at myself.” His mother picked the knife up again and snapped off two strawberry tops in one swipe. “That girl’s been through a lot. I knew she didn’t have a mother to help her.” Her hands shook as desperately as her voice. “I should have gone after her. What kind of Christian woman...”